Getting Away By Yourself
I’m back! I found my mojo again. I cannot tell you how great it feels to be out from the dark cloud and finding my voice again. Writers block sent me down a rabbit hole for awhile but the one thing that can always put me straight is getting away alone.
I love my family, don’t get me wrong. They are my favorite people on the planet, but too much togetherness can bring about feelings of animosity if you don’t find time for yourself. This is true for anyone, but for writers especially. Writing is a solitary business. But what if you aren’t a writer? Would you still benefit from time alone? I can say, unabashedly YES! Everyone needs time alone.
For five years, I’ve found a few long weekends a year to get away on my own. Driving with the windows down, the music on, or a podcast that’s inspirational, can get you in the groove to unwind and put you back on the path to yourself. Life can be chaotic, overwhelming even, and although we’d never trade those that we love, if you are past the point of exhaustion, a few days away on your own can do wonders for refocusing, and feeling more peaceful.
Susan Squellanti Florence, wrote a book called, TIME ALONE, The gift of being with yourself. I have had this for many years and it has this passage that says, “When you take time alone, you leave the distractions of the day…and enter the secret garden of your soul.” I mean, WOW! That’s pretty deep, right? Well it’s true.
My first night relaxing. 
The Albion coast sunset.
This crazy-ass year of 2020 has actually given me a gift. I talked a bit in my previous blog about how in the beginning of Covid, I was really handling things pretty well before I plummeted somewhere around the middle of summer. Anyway, one of the things I picked back up again, that I hadn’t made time for in years was to meditate. YES… I know, some of you find that too woo-woo, to do. I’m here to tell you, it’s all part of spending time alone.
Meditating is a great way to tune into your soul. Practicing stillness in a world that only moves faster, and expects more, can be very rejuvenating. When you meditate, you can really listen to what it is your body and spirit are trying to tell you. And you don’t have to be sitting cross legged in an ashram, chanting to meditate. Just practicing stillness is meditating. Quieting the mind and being in the present moment is all it takes.
I usually like to find somewhere on the coast to write. For me, being near the ocean and listening to the waves crash against the shoreline, smelling the salty air, and feeling the mist against my skin, it all releases me from life’s stressors. I feel a connectedness to the earth that reminds me I am worthy, and part of this fabulous Universe, born with a right to experience love, joy, and creativity.
When I sit down in a quiet space to write after exposing myself to a place of beauty and grace, I tap into a well of inspiration. It clears the cobwebs that have blocked me from my passion. Being in a calming and quiet place can also bring clarity to areas of your life that might have been murky before.
During one of my stays away, I received a call from a friend. She was literally in awe of the fact that I traveled by myself. She couldn’t fathom the idea of one, being alone in a strange place, and two, that my husband let me go. Once we established the fact that women don’t need permission to have time alone, she admitted that it’s just a little bit scary to be alone and traveling. I assured her that it was spectacular! I said, “You know that feeling when your husband and the kids are gone for awhile and you have the whole house to yourself?” she sighed and said, “Yes, I love it when that happens.” I then said, “Well, imagine that for three or more days.” THEN she got it!
The thing is, most women feel that the husbands cannot handle the household without them. That’s simply not true. But if you are not able to leave for other reasons, then at least schedule an afternoon away on your own. Pick somewhere close enough that you can be home by bedtime, or dinner time if you need to, and it should be a place that gives you utter peace, and joy. I’m not talking about a girl’s day out, although those are very much needed too. I’m talking about a place you can be alone! Solitude is key for truly tapping into stillness and being completely calm.
When you return to your chores and daily life after time spent alone, there is often a shift. Mostly it will bring you the ability to do your life with more zest, and a better attitude. But don’t be surprised if you find that you are realizing you need to make some changes. Probably you will want to make changes that bring you more of what you just had… time.
So I will leave you with this. Time alone will quiet your mind, and your heart. If you are a creative, (an artist, writer, musician, architect, chef, florist, …the list goes on and on), then you know you need time for inspiration to strike. Sometimes you have to go seeking that inspiration. Sitting in the presence of beauty and wonder can do that for you. But EVERYONE needs time alone.
A Course in Miracles, says, “Within ourselves there is a silence into which the world cannot intrude. There is an ancient peace you carry in your heart and have not lost.”
I highly suggest you plan your next time away alone soon. You’ll be glad you did.
Wishing you all inspiration
*All pictures taken by Patti Diener, yes even the feature pic. I used a tripod.
